Finding Compassion by Pushing Through Fear

Husband & wife: Rodney Yee & Colleen Saidman on the beach.
Colleen Saidman wrote an inspired post about going into the world with eyes open. There are times --sometimes great stretches of, where it seems easier not to take on the problems of the world. It's far more convenient for us to categorize things into little presumptive compartments to avoid a mess. But how long can we do this before we are forced out of our comfort zone into a world of conflict, contradiction, inconvenience and pain?

I know, it's so much easier to adhere to conventional wisdom and mind our own business. Let the world's ills be settled by others. But who wants to remain static? I've found that discomfort leads to a shift in perception. When we question what we think we know, and then to have it proven wrong --that's when enormous growth can occur. And in growing, we find opportunities to befriend, find joy, and most of all, become more compassionate beings.

Since my husband and I started on this military path in full blown middle age, I've had a lot of assumptions smashed. Let's face it. I had loads of wrong impressions about soldiers based on stereotypes that (in retrospect) --were loaded with prejudice. In the aftermath, there were times I was scorched, but I always recovered. Before, full in the flush of my first 48 years, I could ignore the pain of every soldier and military spouse. I could decide not to learn how to get along with people who had opposite experiences, outlooks and even politics from mine. But that's no longer. I'm one "of them." But the best part? Their experiences makes me want to be a better person. Their pain? I share and carry it with me everyday. This pain makes me grateful for all the small things in life.

But I also share in their triumphs --from deep bonds of brother and sisterhood, to seeing them helping the locals. It's been painful to hear the stories of those with PTSD. The upshot is that I get to meet people working to help them. This includes Eric Walrabenstein , a former infantry officer, now a yogi developing a program for veterans centered on stress reduction. There's also the Warrior Transition Units that help the wounded heal spiritually, physically and emotionally. This has been an education in how the military is addressing the multi-dimensional needs of the human condition.

I went from reading Jane Austen to books written by soldiers that were graphic and sad. Their books have given me insight about war and its consequences. But more importantly, they bridged a gap that had been incomplete. In addition, because of my husband's role in a Forward Surgical Team in a combat zone, I was able to send out a request for shoes and clothing on my blog. People whom I will probably never meet responded by sending things to his plywood and canvas hospital. Each day, the team treated soldiers, insurgents and locals (they still do). Children made up 80% of his patient load. Including this little girl, who wore my daughter's shirt.

There were plenty of difficult days, but it only made me stronger. And each time tears were shed, ten more people stepped into help. Each person who reached out --be it a soldier in a village, a local giving back to a soldier, or a supporter sending a box, they found within them the capacity to overcome fear and extend the laurel branch. There's growth in that, and when growth occurs, those moments of peace serve as a fuel to want to do more.

So yeah, it's not enough to go to the studio, do a bunch of green stuff, or say Aummmm. The courage we find in meditation, or trying some crazy pose Rodney and Colleen claim we can do, is to take the same into the wider world, find order within ourselves and a resolve to help.

Note: this was written for The Gaiam Yoga Club. Stop by and join!