In Marjah: Buying From Locals

"Marine Brigadier General Nicholson buys a bag of popcorn from a smiling vendor not far from where fierce battles took place just days ago."
This is the right thing to do. Let's hope it happens with regularity. When The Hubs was deployed, he purchased scarves, hats, a large rug for the yoga area from the locals, learned Pashto and even tutored the janitor in English. Small gestures like the one above can go a long way. And I'm sure that popcorn being dried from the local fields, then popped is a great deal fresher than anything he's ever tasted over here! The story is here in the L.A. Times.
Also, read the COIN Primer from the Warrior Legacy Foundation.

Finding Compassion by Pushing Through Fear

Husband & wife: Rodney Yee & Colleen Saidman on the beach.
Colleen Saidman wrote an inspired post about going into the world with eyes open. There are times --sometimes great stretches of, where it seems easier not to take on the problems of the world. It's far more convenient for us to categorize things into little presumptive compartments to avoid a mess. But how long can we do this before we are forced out of our comfort zone into a world of conflict, contradiction, inconvenience and pain?

I know, it's so much easier to adhere to conventional wisdom and mind our own business. Let the world's ills be settled by others. But who wants to remain static? I've found that discomfort leads to a shift in perception. When we question what we think we know, and then to have it proven wrong --that's when enormous growth can occur. And in growing, we find opportunities to befriend, find joy, and most of all, become more compassionate beings.

Since my husband and I started on this military path in full blown middle age, I've had a lot of assumptions smashed. Let's face it. I had loads of wrong impressions about soldiers based on stereotypes that (in retrospect) --were loaded with prejudice. In the aftermath, there were times I was scorched, but I always recovered. Before, full in the flush of my first 48 years, I could ignore the pain of every soldier and military spouse. I could decide not to learn how to get along with people who had opposite experiences, outlooks and even politics from mine. But that's no longer. I'm one "of them." But the best part? Their experiences makes me want to be a better person. Their pain? I share and carry it with me everyday. This pain makes me grateful for all the small things in life.

But I also share in their triumphs --from deep bonds of brother and sisterhood, to seeing them helping the locals. It's been painful to hear the stories of those with PTSD. The upshot is that I get to meet people working to help them. This includes Eric Walrabenstein , a former infantry officer, now a yogi developing a program for veterans centered on stress reduction. There's also the Warrior Transition Units that help the wounded heal spiritually, physically and emotionally. This has been an education in how the military is addressing the multi-dimensional needs of the human condition.

I went from reading Jane Austen to books written by soldiers that were graphic and sad. Their books have given me insight about war and its consequences. But more importantly, they bridged a gap that had been incomplete. In addition, because of my husband's role in a Forward Surgical Team in a combat zone, I was able to send out a request for shoes and clothing on my blog. People whom I will probably never meet responded by sending things to his plywood and canvas hospital. Each day, the team treated soldiers, insurgents and locals (they still do). Children made up 80% of his patient load. Including this little girl, who wore my daughter's shirt.

There were plenty of difficult days, but it only made me stronger. And each time tears were shed, ten more people stepped into help. Each person who reached out --be it a soldier in a village, a local giving back to a soldier, or a supporter sending a box, they found within them the capacity to overcome fear and extend the laurel branch. There's growth in that, and when growth occurs, those moments of peace serve as a fuel to want to do more.

So yeah, it's not enough to go to the studio, do a bunch of green stuff, or say Aummmm. The courage we find in meditation, or trying some crazy pose Rodney and Colleen claim we can do, is to take the same into the wider world, find order within ourselves and a resolve to help.

Note: this was written for The Gaiam Yoga Club. Stop by and join!

Bail Outs Help Zap Spouse Tuition

Every milspouse faces the uneasy prospect of one day being the sole breadwinner for the family. Part of the covenant that the military formed with families was to set aside
educational monies to milspouses to help them obtain further their careers.

But today, as reported in The Army Times, the program was shut down. Thousands of men and women who have signed up for courses will not be able to pay for them. They will have to drop out, delaying the enrichment of their education and the development of their careers.

I've spent many years dealing with publicly funded programs. As usual, the benefits were taken away without warning and the reasons for doing so were vague. Programs like this are always at the mercy of funding. I've learned (one example) that if the government will not hesitate to take away mental health funding from kids, programs for milspouse tuition could easily follow.

But it angers me. Obviously, the bailouts of AIG, Wall Street, the mortgage industry, and GM were far more important than sending spouses to school. I can't see any benefit of having had bailed out industries that were corrupt and laden with sloth. But I can see that people who want to further their education warrant more support than those industries.

Walter Reed Medical Officers to be disciplined over Hassan: Caduceus bites back

It seems that the Army has marked medical officers in regard to the retention of Major Hassan. Six, but as many as eight are being held accountable for allowing Major Hassan to continue in his position. Hassan displayed ineptitude as an intern. His poor reviews continued as a resident, and after graduation as a staff psychiatrist.

It would be easy to merely point to a policy of keeping bad people in as the culprit. But ultimately, it's people who decide whether or not to strive for excellence or settle for mediocrity. It was a breach of public trust to extend tolerance for his growing ineptitude. Keeping Hassan in was a choice, and while one may argue that this was how business was done, at some point it's the individual who has to come forth for the side of what's right. But this is only the first step. It's imperative that the retention policy be changed.

If it doesn't then certainly what this points to is a tendency in our society to find fall guys and then do nothing to change the system. I think we are better than that. As for those who are stuck with their careers ending on this most inglorious note, they will go onto jobs in the private sector. They will find doctors afraid to blow the whistle on the few colleagues who are alcoholics, drug addicts, frauds, willfully engage in malpractice, and glorify in laziness. They will find greedy health insurance companies, a maze of insurance regulations, toady hospital executives, litigious patients and seedy lawyers. They will pay big bucks for malpractice insurance and their entire existence will hinge on a medical assistant and receptionists --who will either make their day, or break them.

One hopes as they switch from being salaried to having to get paid for each patient they see, that they will decide not to turn a blind eye toward callous ineptitude. Doing so, would be a breach of public trust. Whether they are practicing in the military or in the private sector, they will continue to be public servants.

Sunday: Requiem For A Soldier

Today, I'm remembering the generation that shaped my childhood.
My generation was raised by a stalwart, ambitious group of men and women. They had been through the Great Depression. Some had aunts, uncles or parents who served in World War I. Many had seen and been through not one, but two wars. Many would see their sons go to Vietnam.

They educated themselves on the GI Bill, started new industries, entered professions, and created a world that seemed to have no limits. They wanted to give us everything, and they did. We had good public schools, better nutrition and immunizations that didn't exist when they were young. This is not to say that those of us who were raised and generously provided for by them would agree with their outlook all the time. Their values and etiquette were tested by a new generation. We tried, experimented, tossed out, embraced, and made up new stuff. None of this would have been possible though, were it not for their own bravery to expand the boundaries of the world they had been raised. We owe them a lot.

But there is no doubt, that those of us old enough to remember testing tubes for Black and White TV's, were greatly influenced, even awed by their achievements and civic mindedness.

Today, the veterans of WWII and Korea are quietly passing onto the other side. Here's a slide show set to the theme song from Band Of Brothers, sung by Amici Forever, on The Opera Band CD. I think they do the best rendition of the son. Enjoy.

Will my son's generation be the next greatest one? Two wars, an economic downturn? They already are.

"The Golden Hour:" Saving lives in the combat zone

Neil Whitfield, of Neil's Second Decade recently sent me the following link to a story filed this past week by Mark Corcoran of Foreign Correspondent, an offshoot of ABC News Australia.
"The Golden Hour" chronicles the efforts to save lives on the combat zone --from Medevac to the E.R. and also some heartbreaking follow up care to a young Afghan boy whose condition is terminal.

The medical teams help everyone, regardless of nationality. Their first priority is --and always will be in their professional lives, to preserve human life, and let those who are ready to or have already passed on, to do so with dignity. It's all part of their calling. It's why they went into medicine.
WATCH The Golden Hour with Mark Corcoran

Mail Call? A Shout Out To The GYC!

(U.S. Marine Corps photo by Staff Sgt. William Greeson/Released)

During times of war, letters sent from the front were highly coveted and cherished. It has never been easy to get word back and forth, yet in this war we have been fortunate to have technology on our side. Email and skype have been critical in not only keeping the loved ones informed, but gives a dose of morale to the troops. Birthdays have been celebrated, worries conveyed, romances have bloomed, flirtations have gone stale and withered.

If you will recall, in November the Gaiam Yoga Club donated and sent a box of mats, blocks, straps and DVD's to The Hubs at the FST. I was amazed because I'd neither asked nor solicited them, they just decided to do it. So Nicole and the staff put together this enormous shipment for the new yoga area that The Hubs and the team set up in the new FST. Unfortunately, the entire shipment got hung up in Kabul. Though The Hubs had an ongoing email with the shipment dude in Kabul, it was clear that he wasn't going to be sussed to get it onto a transport to the FST, which in no means was an easy thing to do.

Still, things have been known to happen in Afghanistan ...like the disappearance of the surgical sink destined for the FST, and its subsequent reappearance six weeks later. To give you an idea of how difficult it is to receive and send mail, I found this snippet from one of The Hub's emails sent to me last autumn:

"Still no outgoing mail. It has become very dangerous outside the wire and many drivers simply will not go out on the road. Nobody blames them. They are going to try again to do a "postal rodeo" as they call it, but the staff office didn't sound too optimistic."

Sadly, the folks at Gaiam received the entire shipment back last week. Yup, the shipment dude decided it was far easier to send it back to Boulder CO, than get it out to the FST. Not to be deterred, The Gaiam Yoga Club still has this shipment earmarked for the troops. We're working on getting them into a Warrior Transition Unit at the base hospital where the Hubs is posted stateside. If not there, he'll find a way to get them sent back to Afghanistan, if not take them back himself during the next deployment. (Now that oughta be an interesting sight!)

We are most appreciative to Nicole at the GYC for working so hard with us on this project. By the way, you can look them up on Facebook. They post simple and fun exercises for all.

Happy Valentines Day

The Writing Post: Hope in Poetry

The reason I'm asking you to read about poetry is that it can be a transformational experience. I'll show you how. Just read on.

I don't think there has ever been a time in life where there wasn't poetry. Perhaps it was a way of seeing things: a mixing of nature, art and emotion. Poetry has offered me hope, it has rescued me. But not in that loud coffee house way. Rather, its ability to touch me with language so compressed, and imagery so vivid, has shown me that sliver of light. The rhythm, the sounds, the shape of the stanzas, the number of lines --all work together.

Imagine my delight when my daughter told me she had to choose three poems for a class project. I have a bookcase full of volumes of poetry. I pulled out some books, and left her to it. Here is one of the three she chose. I'm thrilled because it's so insightful.

The Artist

by Stanley Kunitz

His paintings grew darker every year.

They filled the walls, the filled the room;

eventually the filled his world--

all but the ravishment.

When voiced faded, he would rush to hear

the scratched soul of Mozart

endlessly in gyre.

Back and forth, back and forth,

he paced the paint-smeared floor,

diminishing in size each time he turned,

trapped in his monumental void,

raving aginst his adversaries.

At last he took a knife in his hand

and slashed an exit for himself

between the frames of his tall scenery.

Through the holes of his tattered universe

the first innocence and the light

came pouring in.

Now read it again, and see where the change occurs. You'll see the beauty of the image that signals a transformation. See it? He took a knife, and went back into the light.

At different points of your life, a poem will take on deeper meanings. My own reading of Stanley Kunitz's work has changed dimensionally since we took on the war. A small volume of poems can fit in a pocket, can be taken with you, can be memorized, lost, and still be with you. The hope one finds from reading or writing poetry is everlasting.

Giveaway: win a chapbook of my own poetry, by leaving a comment. Winner will be chosen by random.org on Monday.

A Yoga Ha Ha or "Do you really mean it?"

There are times that a bad choice of wording makes me laugh. This is a class description from the Camp Pendleton Group X Fitness Program schedule. See if you can catch the errant word! Click on it to bigify.

See that?
"Distressed?" Perhaps they mean that people will leave feeling energized yet relaxed and balanced. The only thing that I could think of to stress me out would be this sweaty guy in a speedo, in a yoga crucifixion pose standing on my back. Believe me, drippy sweaty guys donning speedos are not my idea of bliss. But maybe that's just me.

Camp Pendleton Fitness does a super job with providing 10 yoga and 1 meditation class throughout the week. I hope to see more bases adopting this approach. Next week, I'm hoping to get down there to take a class. Me with a class of Marines. Any one of them could be my son. I'm sure they'll blanch when I set up my mat ....next to the door.

And as long as we're at it,
here's an alternate pathway to finding that special yoga pose from Darren's blog in Ireland. This is called a supported backbend using a chair, your head and a tree. I think it's real smart how he took the back of the chair off like that. I'm going to ask my teacher if we can try this some day.

Also, if you're on Facebook, look up the Veteran's Peace Initiative, which is devoted to finding pathways to inner peace for those who have served in war.

"Literally, it is a war for freedom"

There are few people who can offer concise knowledge on a range of topics from the history of totems in Queen Charlotte Islands, canoe carving, and how best to find your way each summer in that same canoe you have carved through the San Juan Islands.  Barry Herem  is a listener, thinker, reader, raconteur and friend. Going hand-in-hand, Barry also possesses strong, metered opinions.

He's also a veteran. A well known artist based in Seattle, Barry is well known for his "taut, harmonious works" which take their inspiration from northwest coast native art. The two of us have had a constant correspondence for nearly 20 years. We have kept each others letters, and also converse deeply via email. With his permission, I'm sharing something he recently wrote:

"I am following this and from the videos and news information can see that Marja is a bitch.  Too bad they cannot surround it as they did Falluja.  My fingers are crossed of course.  We'll win.  Of course.  And ultimately put the Taliban to run as we did the Japanese in WW2.

We lost 400,000 in that whole war, 300,000 of which were lost in the Pacific.  But we won.  The Taliban has no more entrenched beliefs than the Japanese did, the latter of whom believed that they, as a race, were not only superior, but that they were destined to rule the world and that their Emperor was divine.  Those three ridiculous, but pivotal, beliefs were not only mistaken, they were completely trounced, altering - benefiting - the entire shape of what amounts to the modern Japanese mind.  This is why I am hopeful.  In what seems to be the only way that we can do it, we will, by force of war and superior killing power, extinguish or render null the radical Muslim, and the Muslim mind in general.  

I wish we all knew how to do this more peaceably, but we don't and so we must do what we are doing. Eliminating from the world those three absurdities of the traditional Japanese way were no more difficult than it will be to eliminate the three ignorant, yet primary, Muslim beliefs of the radicals, that 1. Allah and Mohammed are linked in the only true religion 2. that all of humanity must bow to the will of "their" Allah, and that 3. this can be accomplished over the entire world by force. 

The total furtherance and fulfillment of these three unsound beliefs cannot possibly be accomplished, not ever.  Therefore, however messily, NATO forces will win and, I think, at a far lesser cost in American lives than the great wars of the past have exacted.

There is not only good reason to hope, but good reason to believe that no life and no wounding will be, has been, or can be, in vain.  The course of the world always favors freedom on the mind, which is freedom to live as each of us chooses. This war is then, indeed, a noble cause because literally, it is a war for freedom, which is why we will win.

Love, love, honor and glory to our soldiers."

Women and PTSD

"There have yet to be comprehensive studies about how women are affected differently than men in war zones in Iraq and Afghanistan."
-Los Angeles Times, 8 February 2010

In today's L.A. Times, there's an article about unequal treatment or access to treatment for PTSD in women veterans and soldiers. I know that in our years of private practice, often we saw women who overlooked depression and anxiety disorders within themselves. These often were manifested by eating disorders, compulsive spending habits, delaying treatment, a sense of hopelessness and social isolation. Of course, it's a vicious cycle. Someone extremely under or overweight, or living with a constant level of anxiety will experience related physical problems. Not feeling well affects one's mental outlook as well. I think to an extent, there was also a social component in this: women are expected to muddle through even the worst of times. We are the caretakers, and often we put the needs of others above our own.

I will never forget the 27 year old mother who had a lump on her back for years. She had a baby, and there were complications. Prior to being pregnant, she had never seen a doctor. So she was encouraged to get a biopsy. It turned out to be cancer. During exploratory surgery, it was found to have spread all over her body. She was dead within months.

Things we heard in our surgical practice where we dealt with cancer and illnesses: "I can take care of myself. I'm fine. I don't need help. I'm not going to a shrink. I don't have time. Oh, it's nothing. It'll pass." 

So, the questions to women veterans and healthcare workers within and outside the system are (there are no right or wrong answers):

1.  Do you think there is a social component to this issue? 
2. Do you feel your emotional challenges have manifested themselves in physical symptoms?
3.  Do you perceive a shortfall in VA services dedicated to PTSD in women? 
4.  Women veterans w/ PTSD:  would you be more comfortable in a group therapy session with other women?  __Yes, __No, __Don't care, __Haven't thought about it
5. What has stopped you from getting treatment?
6. What made you start?
7. What has made you either quit or keep going?

 Anonymous comments are welcome.

Gentle reminder: on the sidebar to the right is a link to free help available in most communities through NAMI.

War and the Art of Waiting

A garden in Manhattan
This morning I was awakened by crashes of thunder & lightening. Then a downpour so loud, the rain hitting the awnings made such a racket it was pointless to go back to sleep. I decided to look for a radar map --lo and behold the red cell was just above. I cruised over to Facebook. There was a message from a friend. She hadn't heard from her Marine, and her comfort level was being stretched.

I remembered what the writer Frank Schaeffer wrote me: "no news is good news."
Despite the fact that The Hubs is stateside (for a bit), war has left me with an ineffable wallop, as if I've been punched in the gut. It's like always having an odd taste in my mouth: no matter how many times I brush my teeth or gargle, no matter how many mints I pop, it's still there. There are also times when I have to remember to breathe. Maybe it's because of my age, I feel like all of those men and women are my kids. Like you, I want them home. Like you, I wait.

So I reminded her that every day she has to do something nice for herself. Her Marine would want her to do that. Perhaps it's going for a walk just after a rain and looking at the trees and flowers. Going to yoga, curling up with a cat, going out for tea and cake ...something that allows you to just be yourself. You have to do these things for yourself because chances are, no one else will do it for you. It's during these times of introspection that allows you to develop gratitude for the small things that so often we overlook.

My thoughts today go to the 15,000 Marines and Allied Forces who are gearing up for the Battle for Marja. I think Maj Pain at One Marine's View has written a post that is poetic, poignant, epic and apropos on the eve of this battle.
Read it here at Never Take It For Granted.

Hat tip: Mrs. Greyhawk at Mudville Gazette

You Have Woman, I Have 50 Turkeys, and Jack Bauer: A Luddite

Afghanistan
I attended the 2010 West conference in San Diego, sponsored by the US Naval Institute and the AFCEA. I only went there to see Boston Maggie. But I walked into a technology conference that made Tom Clancy and Jack Bauer look like luddites. 2010 West

"is the largest event on the West Coast for communications, electronics, intelligence, information systems, imaging, military weapon systems, aviation, shipbuilding, and more."

The conversations were brilliant, not only on the panels, but at the luncheon table. So many smart people with loads of experience. I wish those impromptu chats could have gone on forever. Though I had nothing to add,  I was absorbing their perspectives like a sponge.

There were eyebrow raising moments. Admiral James G. Stavridis, Supreme Allied Commander, Europe and Commander, United States European Command, detailed the challenges presented by the expansion of the cyber world and our reliance on it. Stavridis gave an indication of what types of services and products the military needs: a pitch to the many developers and business --both small and large, in attendance. One glimpse of the future he shared was Afghans could be paid through wireless payment processing made via a mobile device. I happened to be sitting next to Francis La Chapelle, Director of Network Access Sales for GCI, who pointed out that m-commerce is taking place in Africa and other nations.

Perhaps Admiral Stavridis' vision will one day bear fruit, though I'm not sure the transition will happen any time before July 2011. It's difficult to imagine after The Hubs relayed this story, which occurred while he was there.*

A farmer offered the Commander of their base 50 turkeys if they'd sell him their Lieutenant. Apparently, she was very nice, pretty, and made solid gains in creating good communication between the military and the locals. Fortunately, the Commander politely declined. I'm not sure what he offered the farmer in exchange, but perhaps the Commander should start keeping a stash of Blackberries on hand should this come up again. And by Blackberries, I don't mean the fruit.

* I had to search through the many emails to make sure I had the number of turkeys and rank correct! But yes, this really did happen.

The Gratitude Thread Giveaway Winner!

Chosen by number generator Random.org:

The winner of the Gratitude Thread giveaway is CI Roller Dude!
I'll bet he didn't even know he could win 2 boxes of Coffee Nips just by commenting on the thread! Email me with yer info, dude! Those will get out to you asap!

Other news, I attended 2010 West. A technology based conference that makes Jack Bauer look like a luddite. The big guns were there, Admirals, Vice Admirals, US Naval Institute Blog, as well as the manufacturers --Boeing, Raytheon, Thules, etc. etc. etc. Now I know what happens to math nerds when they grow up.

Overlooked but essential

Gratitude.
One of the most overlooked life defining forces.
Essential, gratitude is grounding. When combined with love and humor it can cause one to smile ridiculously through the course of the day.

What are you grateful for? Just name a few things off the top of your head in under a minute.

Here are some things I'm grateful for:
family, friends, home, hearth, pets, flowers, walks, being able to get up, trees, trees with big canopies, music, art, literature, writing, blue skies, clouds, smiles, hearing laughter, laughing, coffee nips, wearing shorts, flip flops, sitting in the sun, a good drink now and then. Fresh fruit, silence, and peace.

You see, I'm very lucky. Think of all those who live under oppressive regimes where some of the above will get you in trouble.

UPDATE: If there are more than 12 comments, a name will be chosen and the recipient will recieve 2 boxes of Coffee Nips!